Click Here to Play "The Final Challenge"

(located at mud.finalchallenge.net port 4000)

Cordir performs for PezQuest IV


Disclaimer: The story Cordir relate was written by The Chosen of Fate for their bid in one of Lorna's Chance auctions. You won't see "Cordir says, " because she recho'd the whole thing. The song sung at the end is one I modified, that my sister wrote, which is a filksong version of 'Fiddler on the Roof''s "If I were a Rich Man".

Once u-pun a time I herd a story, a barnyard tail which so cowed me that I
sheepishly retreated to my quarters with a Hay now, that's the last straw!
Pez giggles.
until I felt more stable (I was stalled there quite some time).
It went something like this:
Pez throws back his head and cackles with insane glee!
The animals were feeling cocky one morning and some of them were horsing around,
crowing about how nifty they were. Bess, the cow, had just had a calf.
Pez chuckles, evidently amused.
She was milking the attention she got for all it was worth.
I'm just in such a good moooood, she remarked to anyone who would listen.
Pez laughs.
Quit dogging us with that bull, said the horse.
You know you'll just farm the baby out to someone else.
Pez giggles.
Are you kidding? said the goat. She'll hoof it over to anyone who'll admire her baby.
Bess tossed her head and said, You're just jealous because I got lucky.
Can't we all just love one an udder?
I think that'd be the bestial of all worlds, agreed the goat.
Holstein it right there! said Hank the Mule.
Pez chuckles, evidently amused.
"I don't mean to sound like an ass, but I am stuck on the horns of a dilemma:
if we're getting into that sort of thing, who should I ram first?
In Jersey we take these things seriously.
Yuck! said Bess.
Ha! Got your goat! said Hank. Now don't have a cow, you can just cat around like you always do.
Pez giggles.
Bess said, "Veal, all right, I suppose. I mean, I don't want to be accused of a fowl display of temper, or of being chicken! I'm just concerned about my baby. I don't want to leave his rearing up to chance."
She reconsidered a moment, then added, Now leaving it to Fate might not be too baaaad..
Pez laughs.
Oh you're so full of bull! said Hank.
Screw ewe! snapped Bess. "Just because you're low in the pecking order doesn't mean you get to pull the wool over our eyes!"
I'm sick of cowtowing to you! said Hank.
You get your feathers ruffled over nothing and I'm tired of it! I'm crying fowl!
Bess, angry at Hank's root manners, goosed him.
Pez giggles.
He'd never had an eggperience like that before and was nearly shellshocked.
He considered her reaction cow-ardly.
He hammed it up, acting very offended, until Bess accused him of being boarish.
He fielded her accusation calmly - what else cud he do?
It was all just one long bad yolk, really.
Pez chuckles, evidently amused.
Ta-Da!
Sturm laughs.
Sturm bounces around.
Pez laughs.
Someone frowns.
Cordir says, 'Now, I cannot take credit for it'
Pez says (in common), 'say you still have 6 minutes'
Sturm says (in common), 'very good M'lady!!!'
Cordir says, 'The entire following wrote it.'
Cordir shakes her head.
Someone says, 'I was going to say, that's rather familiar.'
Pez says (in common), 'would you like to continue?'
Cordir says, 'I'm not really competing.'
Pez says (in common), 'ahhh'
Cordir says, 'Just wanted to share'
Sturm bounces around.
Pez says (in common), 'well, let me calculate your score anyways'
Someone says, 'Trakker's bid, that is, no?'
Cordir says, 'Deamhan's bid.'
Sturm says (in common), 'Lady Cordir, you should try to win, then give all the stuff to your following :)'
Cordir says, 'But I'm not very funny...'
Pez nods in recognition to Sturm.
Sturm smiles happily.
Sturm chuckles, evidently amused.
Cordir says, 'sorry about that'
Cordir says, 'lost connect'
Pez smiles at you.
Cordir says, 'Like I was saying, I'm not terribly funny....'
Pez says (in common), 'your score is 195 which puts you in third place'
Cordir blinks.
Cordir says, 'well, somehow I don't think I can beat stoutie'
Cordir says, 'he is, after all, an Ogre...'
Cordir ponders the question.
Cordir says, 'Lets see...'
Cordir says, 'Funny things...'
Pez says (in common), 'i liked your story very much'
Pez says (in common), 'i have a weakness for puns you know'
Cordir ponders the question.
Cordir says, 'Why did the Anathema cross the road?'
Pez says (in common), 'i'm laggin gbadlly'
Sturm says (in common), 'who has secone Pez?'
Pez shrugs.
Someone says, 'You should have seen Stout's performance last night.'
Pez says (in common), 'was it lgged?'
Cordir says, 'Because most PKers are really chickens....'
Pez giggles.
Sturm says (in common), 'giggle'
Someone nods.
Someone says, 'by a few people.'
Sturm chuckles, evidently amused.
Cordir ponders the question.
Sturm claps at your performance.
Pez says (in common), 'say your score is still rising'
Pez gossips (in common), 'was stouthbounds performance last night logged?'
Cordir says, 'What do you call it when you're killed by a Conclave warric?'
Pez shrugs.
Cordir says, 'being Rockyed and Rolled.'
Pez chuckles, evidently amused.
Cordir ponders the question.
Sturm laughs.
Sturm says (in common), 'I know some people who have lots of claver jokes'
Sturm says (in common), 'I should tell them that one, compliments of Lady Cordir'
Pez says (in common), 'times up cordir'
Cordir bows to Sturm.
Cordir nods in recognition to Pez.
Sturm bounces around.
Nyx prays, '"Time's up"?'
Pez says (in common), 'your revised score is now 215'
Cordir giggles.
Sturm says (in common), 'M'lady, you should go again :)'
Pez says (in common), 'and you are still in third place'
Someone says, 'You should have done that song you had me put into Tabris, Cordir.'
Cordir ftells, 'Pez says (in common), 'your revised score is now 215''
Cordir ponders the question.
Sturm looks at Tabris, Minion of Chance.
Cordir says, 'I didn't keep a copy of it.' She sighs.
Mael arrives from the west.
Tabris, Minion of Chance says, 'So, when was the last time you did something worthy of being called Heroic, eh Mael?'
Palmer arrives from the west.
Cordir says, 'Oh, wait! I think I remember it.'
Trevor arrives from the west.
Tabris, Minion of Chance reaches behind your ear and pulls out a coin!
Cordir says, 'Palmer, are you allowed to go again?'
Pez nods.
Trevor looks at Tabris, Minion of Chance.
Cordir says, 'Pardon, I meant Pez'
Pez says (in common), 'you may go again, cordir'
Sturm gasps in astonishment.
Sturm comforts Pez.
Palmer snickers softly.
Cordir says, 'Okay, this will take some set up'
Pez says (in common), 'no problem, that was a complement'
Someone says, 'if you would, Cordir enter the room normally?'
Palmer hugs Pez.
Cordir says, 'Pez, ready?'
Pez says (in common), 'almost'
Cordir says, 'the Bard of Chance is going to sing a song I wrote.'
Pez says (in common), 'okay, go!'
w
Guild Hall
[Exits: north east south west]
(Blue Aura) Grishmo is here.
(Invis) (Blue Aura) Nemo is here.
An Ofcol cityguard is posted here to guard the gate.
e
The Kitchen
[Exits: west]
A small white fountain gushes forth here.
Trevor is here.
(Invis) (Blue Aura) Mael is here.
(Blue Aura) A young bard with a gleam in his eye seems to be waiting for something.
(Hide) (White Aura) A Bounty Hunter searches relentlessly for his quarry.
(Blue Aura) Sturm is resting here.
Pez is here.
Someone says, 'oh.'
Someone says, 'Actually . . .'
Pez says (in common), 'giggle'
Pez says (in common), 'i need to be able to see him...and he is the contestant'
Cordir says, 'I'll just sing it...'
Someone says, 'one of several people's followers needs to do it.'
Cordir says, 'Its okay'
Pez nods.
Sturm says (in common), 'we should l'
Pez says (in common), 'okay, cordir'
Sturm says (in common), 'oops'
Mael leaves west.
Mael arrives from the west.
Someone says, 'let me work on him a bit.'
Mael leaves west.
Mael arrives from the west.
Mael leaves west.
Mael arrives from the west.
Tabris, Minion of Chance says, 'Turkey day, eh? There's a turkey if I've ever seen one.'
Tabris, Minion of Chance disappears in a mushroom cloud.
Cordir sings, 'If I should meet a Conclave... I would turn and run ....'
Cordir sings, 'But not from fear... but from a sense of SMELL!'
Pez chuckles, evidently amused.
Cordir sings, 'All day long, they run around in leather...'
Cordir sings, 'But do they ever bathe?'
Pez giggles.
Cordir sings, 'NEVER!'
Sturm throws back his head and cackles with insane glee!
Cordir sings, 'Conclave thinks they're real strong...'
Pez laughs.
Cordir sings, 'And they are, but not in quite the way that they want us to think...'
Cordir waves her hand under her nose.
Chronic arrives from the west.
Chronic drinks water from a fountain.
Chronic leaves west.
Pez chuckles, evidently amused.
Cordir sings, 'All day long, they drink and curse and swear...'
Cordir sings, 'But will they change their underwear?'
Pez throws back his head and cackles with insane glee!
Cordir yells, 'no!'
Sturm laughs.
Trevor throws back his head and cackles with insane glee!
Cordir sings, 'So what to do with Conclave?'
Cordir sings, 'Some say hanging's much too good for such a filthy lot as they...'
Cordir sings, 'I suggest....'
Cordir sings softly, 'That you forget the rope....'
Cordir looks left...
Cordir looks right....
Cordir sings, 'And simply get a bar....'
Pez giggles.
Cordir sings, 'of.....'
Cordir sings, 'SOAP!!!!'
Sturm rolls his eyes.
Pez throws back his head and cackles with insane glee!
Sturm says (in common), 'oops'
Sturm says (in common), 'wrong one'
Cordir bows deeply.
Sturm laughs.
Sturm throws back his head and cackles with insane glee!
Sturm bounces around.
Pez says (in common), 'very nice'
Sturm nods.
Pez claps at your performance.
Cordir smiles happily.
Sturm says (in common), 'that would be first if I was running the quest :)'
(end log)

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