Pantheon Limericks
Notes: Around or about 2006, DarkClaw was gossiping some limericks about various immortals, and I decided to get in on the fun. These were created in no particular order. - Cordir 10:17, 17 January 2012 (MST)
Dare I write of the greatest of Dwarves?
Crafting lands from the plains to the wharves
He codes all night and day
(But DM gets her say)
We all hope that he never gets bored!
IvoryTiger gives gold when you 'sac'
If perchance it's a god that you lack
He grants one shiny gold
to the humble or bold
Cat-God, spell-maker, IT's all that!
Maurice cackles and blocks teleports
and your heart sinks right down to your shorts
A dark IMP of days past
Yet his legacy lasts
And he's used for PK by bad sports.
Madman's legacy can't be dismissed
with his code and his areas list
Demon raids down the roads
And his rifting and goads
Moshing, Ozzy and a Dew in his fist!
Darkmoon curls up her whip and she laughs
Snapping suds from her tub in the Baths
She's a mistress of pain
and your loss is her gain
So walk soft if you ere cross her path
For ten thousand eternities, you
will squirm helplessly 'neath Sirak's shoe
While he hums and he plays
that marimba for days
Til you love that strange music, it's true!
Jaxxon's courtly but yet never seen
Like a Paladin out of a dream
But with Dirkstrom and Cat
He preached love just like that
And his followers worked like a team.
There once was a goddess named Bliss
Whose cooking went often amiss
In the kitchen she wailed
as the smoke upward sailed
"Momma said there'd be days like this!"
Clue's a goddess I name with a smile
For she's walked this world for quite a while
With her Rigel away
She was reshaped, like clay
Now she's dressed with a vamp's sense of style
Coleman fills all the world with great glee
Rhyming, Riddling and slapping his knee
With his troupe full of mirth
He's secured quite a berth
in the tales of this game's history.
That Ginny's a girl I sure miss,
Melt a eunich with one simple kiss
Made the most of the dark
or in public, in parks
and the touch of her whip was sheer bliss.
Grimace, named for a big purple thing
Wearing nothing at all, no 'bling-bling'
His folks are Magi
Or Force-ful type guys
whom the praises of Nidea sing
Now to history lost, I concede
Can't recall the god lost, though I need
to come up with a rhyme
for one before my time
Slayer's on the wizlist, that I read. :-)
Kerri lurks in the shadows and Dark
Yelling WHEEEEEEEEEEE just to scare on a lark
A fun loving fellow
who's often quite mellow
Booga's bite is not worse than his bark.
If, by chance, you are dark, goth, and dead
Then you'll not get Khore out of your head
He's a dashing vamp fellow
Who is edgy, not mellow
And sleeps in a box lined with red
Maurice cackles and blocks teleports
and your heart sinks right down to your shorts
A dark IMP of days past
Yet his legacy lasts
And he's used for PK by bad sports.
Molo skulks unseen down in his Crypt
Wearing robes that are tattered and ripped
To Lord Nash he gives praise
Through his nights and his days
When he goes vis, the mortals all flip!
Nati shines oh so bright like a Star
Did you think that she'd rise up that far?
From those long mortal days
Yes, in trouble ten ways
Now her temple's just east of a bar!
Nalya, gentle and sweet, she was kind
With the young's first success on her mind
PBS was her creed
All the newbies in need
And her Paladins all were sublime!
Nayr waits on his disk with his pet
Ygg is inky, a raven that's jet.
Once his feathers were prized
for those with evil guise
But that was before PK debt.
Pyros licked and he flicked and he flamed
Led a firey life in this game
Wed to Syla, so sweet
As a pair they were neat
Since they're gone, TFC aint the same.
Rhina's back! oh rejoice! she was missed :-(
When she left, you could say Khore was pissed
Her sweet blossoms he woo'd
'Til she got in the mood
Now their kids? Vampire plants, what a twist!
From the depths of his quiet, dark Hall
Robert's Unity really aint small
Yes, it's loaded with Dutch
No, don't discount it much
or they'll thwack you until you feel small
Siren! *sigh* yes, the stories are true
Went to red, though she started off blue
Giant-Kin often say
Thaygar made her that way
Ebon, Mist, their alliance stayed true.
With a chuckle and ruffle and wink
Syla's up to her normal hijinks
She's the goddess we love
In the heavens above
when she leaves all the mortal hearts sink.
Tamar dreamwalks or so it was said
by the folks who gave worship and bled
now she sits peacefully
seeking serenity
Oft remembered by those that she led
Thaygar's mind went kersnap in the maze
'Neath chapel and priest and MG graves
The short path to Hell
is the place that he fell
into madness and hand that's ablaze
Sunny bright is lord Tiax's home
Though a dwarf, he is friends with a gnome
Just gaze through occuli
to the light in the sky
and defend it wherever you roam
Toku Balanced it all in old days
Led his own, not down blue or red ways
In a hall full of books
with dozens of 'LOOK's
Now he god-pluses all night and all days
Speak of Sin and one name comes to mind.
Tris is wicked, I'm sure you will find.
He revels in bad
As for him it's no fad
But which first? Thats the biggest of binds.
Whitehawk's aura is blue he'll attest
and that Hawks are among TFC's best
With his eyes on his love
Aoife makes him a dove
Not a predator, like all the rest
Wylin tips back a beer and he grins
When the booze flows, that's one dwarf that wins
From the size of his mug
and that noise of "GLUG! GLUG!"
Thirst must be the worst of his Sins
Of Cordir there is much to be said
On her website most things can be read
Bardic circles and quests
are the things she loves best
'Sides the much loved folks she has led
Sinclair was another quite old
From the tales, he was always too bold
With a name like Arac
How his Paladin whacked
Any evil that ran through the cold.
Kalten's legacy lives ever on
If you land in his zone you'll be gone
Master's Tower kills more
Then his Roses of yore
And gleams Ivory at each southern dawn.
The Killer of Fools treasured threes,
And oft channeled In-fin-ity
The third aspect was feared
Grabbing dwarves by their beards
Be glad that's not his sole legacy!
JP's virtuous; Tel served him well
and the evils like rain often fell
He is seen now and then
Could he Demi again?
Only time and an Imp will e'er tell.
Say ADVENTURE! in tones that are bold
Brings to mind a fine fellow of old
Zarous spelled with a Z
Just as fun as could be
Ah, the stories and tales could be told!
Tel had Paladins out the wazoo
Keller, Anwar, Anonymous, BLUEz...
Crossed Blades they all wore
To slay evil, not bore
Overkill - more than name, it was true!
Lil' Kat is a gnome who glows red
With the voices of Hunt in her head
Once Conclave to the bone
How Lich-legacy's grown
Weilding scissors to hack at each thread